Don't Rank Cuomo

3.6 / 5

21,477 plays

simulation

Game Information

Developer: SZ Games

Rating:

3.6/5

Released: April 2024

Last Updated: June 2025

Technology: HTML5 (Unity WebGL)

Platform: Browser

Size: ~15 MB

Plays: 21,477

Mobile Support: No

About Don't Rank Cuomo

Step into the world of satirical politics with Don't Rank Cuomo, the bite-sized browser sensation taking the indie scene by storm! Dive headfirst into a quirky simulation that flips the script on typical voting games. Here, your goal isn’t just to fill out a ballot—it’s to ensure one name never slips past the rankings. Inspired by real-world events and political intrigue, this indie gem lets you flex your critical thinking and sense of humor in equal measure.

From your web browser, enter an irreverent satire where Andrew Cuomo is once again running for the top office in New York City. But this time, it's up to you and players worldwide to make sure he doesn’t rise through the ranks! Every click shapes the ballot, letting you interactively make your voice heard, whether you’re a New Yorker or just love creative, tongue-in-cheek gameplay.

Don’t Rank Cuomo stands out with its sharp, minimalist visuals and smooth HTML5 performance. Designed for quick, snackable play sessions, you’ll jump right in and master the mechanics in seconds—just click or tap your choices (except Cuomo!), and watch the results unfold live. The interface is snappy, humorous, and full of smart nods to modern electoral processes, keeping you hooked with every run.

Fans of indie satire, meme culture, and browser games will instantly feel at home. Each session is short, sweet, and endlessly replayable—perfect for break times or whenever you crave a dose of irreverent fun. And since the action is browser-based, there’s no download or install required. Don’t Rank Cuomo isn’t just a game; it’s a viral experience, inviting you to poke fun at politics and giggle at the absurd. Can you resist the urge to rank Cuomo? Rally your friends, share your high score, and dive into one of the internet’s quirkiest political games today!

How to Play

Getting started with Don't Rank Cuomo is refreshingly easy, making it the ideal pick-up-and-play political satire experience. To begin, simply click the "Run Game" button at the top of the browser page. The game instantly loads with a stylized ballot interface where familiar and not-so-familiar candidates are displayed, including Andrew Cuomo himself.

Your primary objective is to complete your ballot by ranking any candidate—except for Cuomo. Click or tap on your chosen candidates one at a time to assign rankings, ensuring you deliberately skip over Cuomo's name at every opportunity. The controls are simple: all interactions are done via mouse clicks (or taps for those sneaking in a round on touchscreen laptops).

Once you’ve finished your selections, submit your ballot to see an instant (and often hilarious) outcome. The game may throw in witty asides or unexpected surprises as feedback for your choices, keeping you engaged and entertained for multiple playthroughs.

Beginner Tips:

- Don’t rush! Carefully select only the non-Cuomo options on each ballot screen.

- Explore all the quirky candidate bios; they’re loaded with satirical details and witty commentary.

- Replay as often as you like—each run is quick, offering endless opportunities to refine your anti-ranking skills and discover hidden jokes.

Whether you're a seasoned gamer or brand new to browser simulations, Don't Rank Cuomo offers an accessible and laugh-worthy experience from your very first click.

Controls

mouse

keyboard

Tips & Tricks

Always double-check your ballot before submitting to ensure Cuomo is unranked.
Read all candidate bios for hidden jokes and Easter eggs.
Try alternate ranking orders to reveal different dialogue and endings.
Play multiple times—some outcomes and satirical scenarios only appear after repeated play.
Share your win screens and fail moments on social media to challenge friends.
Keep an eye on the interface for subtle visual gags and memes.
Don't be afraid to experiment; the game rewards creativity and humor.

Game Features

Unique political satire built from real-world headlines
Ultra-accessible, free browser-based gameplay—no downloads needed
Minimalist, witty graphics tailored for quick sessions
Randomized elections for endless replay value
Hidden jokes, Easter eggs, and meme-worthy dialogue throughout
Lightning-fast load times on any desktop browser
A one-of-a-kind voting mechanic you won’t see anywhere else

Frequently Asked Questions

Is Don't Rank Cuomo really free to play?

Absolutely! Don't Rank Cuomo is 100% free to play right in your browser on itch.io. No downloads, no registration—just jump in and start playing instantly.

Can I play Don't Rank Cuomo on my mobile device?

Currently, Don't Rank Cuomo is optimized for desktop browsers only and does not support mobile play. For the best experience, use your favorite web browser on a computer or laptop.

How do I make sure I'm not ranking Cuomo?

When completing your ballot in the game, simply avoid clicking or tapping on Cuomo's name at all steps. Only assign rankings to the other candidates to succeed.

Are there multiple endings or surprises in the game?

Yes! Depending on the order you rank candidates (and which ballots you skip), you may encounter different satirical dialogue, win screens, and pop culture references.

What makes this game different from other simulation titles?

Don't Rank Cuomo combines sharp political satire with simple, addictive mechanics and fresh, meme-driven humor, making it a standout pick for fans of quirky indie games.